How To Make Life Transitions

The only thing constant in life is change. Starting school, getting a new job, the beginning or the end of a relationship, marriage, loss through death, relocating to a new region or even a new country, retirement – the list of life changes is never-ending. But, there is a difference between change and transition. A change is an event that occurs and is usually external. On the other hand, transition is the emotional and behavioral transformation that needs to accompany the external event to ensure a successful shift to the new circumstances. So, when a change takes place in our life circumstances, we need to work on making the psychological transformation as well.

Transitions are difficult for most people. A change usually means that we need to give up something that is familiar and comfortable and learn new ways of being. This is where support and guidance can go a long way in helping one make the shift with least amount of disruption in their physical and psychological well being.

The Process of Transition

In his book, Transitions: Making Sense of Life’s Changes (2004), William Bridges describes three basic stages of making life transitions.

Fall Transition: The first step to any transition is to end existing ways of being. Just like the trees shed their old leaves in fall in preparation for new life, we too need to break existing patterns of behavior, say goodbye to the familiar places, people and things.

Winter Transitions: This is middle phase, where we are still attempting to break away from our past but have not as yet fully connected to the new things in life. This is the time to acknowledge and accept the pain, emptiness and apprehension that we might be feeling. It is also the time to acknowledge that while we might be losing things in the transition, we will also be gaining many new things, including new relationships, visiting new places, gaining from new experiences, and much more.

Spring Transitions: Finally comes the time to connect to the new aspects of life and make new beginnings. Just as new life awakens in spring, we need to create new goals for ourselves and experience new achievements.

Life Transition Strategies

Here are some tips that can help you successfully make life transitions:

• Look for and develop support systems, both at home and at work. This can be in terms of new relationships and even the support of a professional life coach or counselor.
• Look for positives in your new environment and use past experience to avoid repetitive pitfalls.
• Look after yourself by eating balanced meals, exercising and taking time out to be by yourself or with family and friends.
• Work on your self esteem within the new set of circumstances.
• Consciously work on being open and flexible, since changes will bring new and at times unpredictable situations.
• Always work on keeping up a positive attitude.
• Know that you are in control of your life. You can decide on how to react to a situation because you can take charge of your thoughts, feelings and actions.
• Know and use all resources available